Sometime around the first week of December, or maybe even a week before Christmas, or for most people I know, about 3 days before January 31st, panic starts to set in. The dreaded New Year’s Eve party planning needs to begin as it is fast approaching. What should we do? What plan is good enough? What is socially acceptable? And worst, what do I tell people when they ask me “what are you doing for New Year’s Eve” and even worse than that what will be my story when coworkers, family, or friends ask me “what did you do for New Year?”.
How many people do we know that send invitations to a New-Year party literally 2 day before New Year’s Eve, and what is more amazing is the high turnout. Most of us don’t get that kind of response if we had called people 2 days before any given weekend as we would find many people are actually busy. But remarkably, people are so worked up about New Year’s Eve planning that they become debilitated. They just can’t decide on a plan that fits the box, the good enough New Year’s Eve plan. So they wait and don’t do anything. Instead they build themselves up and anxiety goes skyrocketing. At this point people are restless and desperate to fill their night. It is exhausting.
So what if we could have a different perspective all together?
Here are 5 ways to relieve anxiety around the New Year’s Eve planning by having a paradigm shift:
Learn from other traditions — New Year in most ancient cultures and traditions is celebrated as a time of renewal. Put your focus on your higher purpose and reflect on what you want to renew in your life. It is time to think of new beginnings and leaving what has ended behind.
Make your own New Year Traditions — For most (not all, but for many) of us the New Year’s Eve, as celebrated in North America today, is not anchored in any traditions. Most people feel they need to be fancy, party hard, get very drunk, or be a part of a massive count-down party crowd. Whatever it is, it needs to be extreme. Regular people that may not be partiers or may enjoy a more casual everyday lifestyle, feel that they need to take it up a few notches. Not because of any intrinsic purpose, but because of the external pressures whose purposes have been lost. So use this time to make new personal and/or family traditions. Be honest and authentic as here is your chance to create something that fits your style and gives you true joy and purpose.
Set your intentions for the New Year — Sit down and actually pick up a pen and paper and write down your intentions and the details of what you want your life to be like in the New Year. Where do you want to be? Who do you want to be? How do you want to feel? Write down about material and none material things. Start the process of manifesting your new life in the New Year. Put this in a collage or a vision board and put it in front of you and have some quiet and meditative time.
Let go of the expectation to have a plan — If you actually don't feel like making a big plan, don't make a plan. Tell people you are not doing anything this year and go inside yourself and see what feelings are evoked inside you. Is it embarrassment? Shame? Guilt? Lack of belonging? Sadness? Or…Use those feelings as information to which areas of your self-esteem you need to work on. Make that your New Year resolution to better yourself.
Do what you actually want to do — Be alone, be social, have a tradition, go to a crazy or a fancy party- But do so only if you feel that it is what you actually want to do. Remember it is not what you do that gives you anxiety, it is the expectation of that image that you need to fulfill, so drop the expectation, be yourself, and have fun.
Happy New Year everyone, wishing you an authentic New Year!
Sabrina Golchin is a mother, wife, entrepreneur, writer, university instructor, public speaker, workshop presenter, therapist, and parent coach who lives, works, and plays in Woodbridge, Ontario. She holds a Masters in Counselling Psychology. She is the proud owner of Life in Harmony Counselling Services www.lifeinharmony.ca which provides counselling services to Children, Families, Parents, and Individuals. She provides in person, on the phone, or on Skype counselling sessions.
You can follow Life in Harmony on Facebook, or contact at info@lifeinharmony.ca